The very first tool I use in my thinking is clarity.  Most of us have a difficult time with communicating clearly, but that is a symptom of not thinking clearly.  I used to watch the sitcom “Seinfeld” all the time.  One episode I remember is a pretty good illustration of “muddying the water” in communication and thinking.  It was the “Yada, yada, yada,” episode, in which George’s girlfriend would answer a question like, “Where did you get that nice watch?” with an unclear answer.  She would respond with, “Oh, I saw in the jewelry store and yada, yada, yada, and now I have it.”

George was unclear what that meant.  Did she buy the watch or did she steal the watch?  His angst rose to a new level when he asked her about how she came about to be eating breakfast with an old boyfriend.  The answer included “We met at a club, Yada yada yada, and we had breakfast.”   Yikes!

Listen to yourself today, and listen to others around you.  How often is our communication and our thoughts behind the communication unclear.  I have been guilty of using the classic, “you know” when I’m having a conversation.  What does that mean? Or when someone says, “So and So is a good employee, or good neighbor.”  What does “good” mean? Are they nice, on time, considerate, always pick up any trash laying around?  Or when someone says, “The Boss is a jerk.” How? Because she held you accountable for you actions? Did she deny your vacation request?

When you run into unclear ideas, like “yada, yada, yada”, or “he’s a jerk”, or “she’s a good employee”, ask these questions to get clarity:

Could you (or I) elaborate on that? (George’s girlfriend obtaining the watch, “Could you elaborate on how the watch came into your possession?)

Could you (or I) express this in another way?  (She’s a considerate neighbor, always picking up any trash, instead of “she’s a good neighbor”.)

Could you (or I) give an illustration? (The classic Good Samaritan story is an illustration of a considerate neighbor.)

Could you  (or I) give an example? (The Boss is a jerk, let me give you an example, the other day she belittled John in front of everybody for even asking for time off to see his daughter graduate Kindergarten.)

It does take quite a bit of effort to clarify your thoughts and your communication, but it’s well worth it.  Others around you, may look at you like you are weird, but getting and giving clear ideas, especially in business and in relationships, pays huge dividends.

Boo Yah!